Superfluities of Chud

As any scholar of degeneration knows, Rodin was considered degenerate because in his quest to perfectly sculpt the human form he would add superfluous muscles and anatomical details (a lesser known fact about The Kiss is that one of the participants actually has three ankles. Fact daddy) to aid the aesthetics of his work. In doing so he offended those fin de siecle types because man was just about perfect before his artistic intervention. One occasionally wonders if Bertie is in fact a Rodinian creation - her superfluities abound. Her hands are in danger of being enveloped by here wrists and her ankles have never actually been seen by the naked eye only vaguely fondled through an impenetrably delightful layer of softest chud. 

Regardless of this flim flam she continues to amaze us all. Whilst still sedentary there was a brief spell where she pulled herself up by the bars of her cot - leading to the first photograph below - this appears to have been a very brief phase that has long since elapsed. Sadly though all is not well in the House of Bertelsmann. Her bottom has entered the third circle of hell - namely chronic constipation. Despite my best efforts to alleviate the situation through popular music; she is a tormented little bean. The generous application of prunes will hopefully prove to be more successful than mid 1990s pop music and this  phase will dissolve peacefully away into but a footnote. 

Watching her manichean struggle with her own self is somewhat awe inspiring (whilst not going "oh Bertie, oh no, Oh Bertie it will be okay" and generally feeling hopelessly hopeless as she struggles on whilst trying to keep it together for the family) as the purity of thought and determination to pursue a single course is remarkable. 

If, in later life, she can apply the same purpose of mind (and she is not overcome by infinite chud) then she will achieve great things. 

And now for the Berthold. 

You'll never guess who I had in the back of the cab today. 

Father, put my bloody clothes back immediately or else you will be in such trouble you wouldn't believe it.
Yes. I'm quite serious.

Ahoy hoy.

Pop 'n' Fresh

Naked Lunch.