Sausage Roll Land

Barrow girl

Hammer time

The Shipping Forecast

Autumn Collection

Nancy is becoming an increasingly complex beast. This complexity is exhibited in the form of very long sentences that meander across time and space and any number of topics. Moreover, she is becoming increasingly aware that her parents, mainly her father it must be said, are occasional purveyors of nonsense. Try and smuggle something passed her and you will be outed as a "silly billy" and the corrected "No, not google baps, GOOGLE MAPS!" She is also quite the plotter. When faced with bed time or another issue that doesn't fill her with glee, she thrusts her hand into the and announces "I have a suggestion, first cake, then song, then Mummy and then bed, yes?" normally accompanied with a sausagey finger for each option. Most are rejected out of hand for being either too cake heavy or wholly unrealistic.

She has also developed a deep love of Land Rover Defenders, like her father, and I think being strapped into the back of one being bounced madly around represented the apogee of her life thus far. Even sitting in it when it was parked up brought her an uncommon amount of pleasure. When this was combined with a trip to sausage roll land, then she was essentially in paradise. This paradise was occasionally tempered by a bit of needle with her cousin Anissa, but unknown to her parents, Nancy is a most excellent brawler and thought nothing of gouging, jumping, rucking and generally manhandling her cousin.

And she has just recently fallen in love with camping. In a big way. And has potentially got a taste for arson thanks to Chumpee and his fire making skills - "But Daddy, I wanted it to burn." She just needs to get over her metropolitan prudery and make peace with compost loos.

Enjoy. x

Can we go to sausage roll land?